|
Post by supersonic28 on Mar 27, 2005 3:55:36 GMT -5
me two*
|
|
Mendaa
New Member
Onii-san
Posts: 4
|
Post by Mendaa on Mar 31, 2005 22:27:56 GMT -5
I'm not quite sure but is this a Hlaf-Life fanfic? I haven't gotten my hands on HL2 yet but it sounds like that's what you're talking about. Your story is very well written, I only have a suggestion for you. Some of the passages seemed a little dry, and just a little more juice would make them amazing. That may just be my personal taste though. Keep it up, I can't wait for the next part!
|
|